Sabado, Hunyo 22, 2013

I am who I am


 “I’ve always been the kind of girl who hid my face. So afraid to tell the world what I’ve got to say. But I have this dream, right inside of me. I gotta let it show, it’s time to let you know…”
                I’m listening to my favorite song all over again. The lyrics really describe me. It fathoms the deepest part of my heart. I’m not the girl everyone wants. But at least, I am who I am.
                It was 19th of March 1997 when I came out to this world. My mother said, I seemed to enjoy staying in her womb because it took 12 hours before I came out. But when she saw me flesh and bone, the 12 hours of suffering seems to disappear.
                I grow up in the province where life is as simple as counting 1, 2, and 3. I live with my very big family. And this whole page is not enough to mention all their names. We live in the same community where we share each others' happiness and sadness. I can give up everything I have in this world, but never my family.
I eat what province people usually eat. We don’t buy our foods in the supermarket; we just go out from the house and pick whatever vegetables or fruits we want to eat. Few steps away from our house are shore where we can also find foods. For these reasons, my favorite foods are sea urchins or also known as “salwaki” for the Bisaya and all kinds of root crops like kamote, ube and kamoteng kahoy. The only foods I hate are raisins. I find it so disgusting.
                As my existence on Earth gets longer, my dreams also get wider. I dream to become the first Filipina that will live on Mars. I want to travel the whole world including the outer space. I also want to marry a Prince someday for I believe that I am a Princess. But what I dream the most is to become the chief justice of the Supreme Court. My dreams are quite hard to reach. But when I believe in myself, I know these dreams will turn into reality.
                We can’t deny the fact that we don’t live alone in this world. We have to deal with people with different personalities. I’m only nice to the person who is nice to me.  I consider someone a friend when he or she makes me laugh. I actually hate people who choose their friends by just looking at their physical appearance. I give my smile to everyone I meet in my way. We meet different people on our lives. Others will make you feel special and others will make you feel worthless. But each one of them plays a role in the drama of our lives.
                I hate being alone. I always want to have a companion wherever I go. I write my feelings when I can’t handle things anymore. It’s my way of releasing my bursting feelings. Passing UPCAT is my biggest achievement so far. I’m not smart that’s why it took days before the news sink in my mind. I believe in God most. I may not see His physical appearance, but I can feel Him deep in my heart.
                I’m not the type of girl-next-door that everyone wants. I’m not like the other girls in the campus that catch everyone’s attention whenever and wherever they are. I don’t have talents that will make others admire me. I mostly wear boyish clothes and I don’t wear make ups. I’m just a normal teenager who dreams a lot. I don’t have the beauty and the talent but I have family and friends. I may not get everyone’s attention but I have God’s undying love. I am unique because I am who I am.
                Now, I am in the place I’ve never been to. A place where everyone is a stranger. I am away from my family, from the province where I grow, far away from my home. My next journey has just begun. I will make it sure it will lead me to a place I can call achievements and opportunities.  I got to hold on to it till it's mine forevermore.
                “This is me, this is real, I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be now. Gotta let the light shine on me. Now I found who I am, there’s no way to hold it in. No more hiding who I wanna be. This is me…”
                The song is done and I found myself asleep under my dreams.
               

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